‘You don’t care about the family’: Couple Having a Child-free Wedding Gets Backlash From Sister-in-law Who Claims They’re Being Selfish For Not Allowing Her Kids to Attend

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    r/AITAH • 1 day ago [deleted] AITAH for Telling My Sister-In-Law She Can't Bring Her Kids to My Child-Free Wedding?
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    Hey everyone, I (29F) am getting married in a few months. My fiancé and I have decided to have a child-free wedding. We both love kids, but we wanted our special day to be an adult affair so that everyone (including the parents) can relax and enjoy themselves without having to worry about their children.
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    We sent out invitations with a note politely explaining that our wedding would be child-free and hoped everyone would understand. Most of our guests were supportive, but my sister-in- law (SIL), who has three kids under the age of 10, was not happy.
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    She called me immediately after receiving the invitation and said it would be impossible for her to attend without bringing her kids. She insisted that she couldn't find a babysitter for the whole day and that it was unfair to exclude her children, who are part of the family.
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    I tried to explain our reasoning and even offered to help her find a sitter or cover the cost of one for the day. She refused and said that if her kids aren't welcome, then she won't come. This led to a heated argument where she accused me of not caring about family and being selfish.
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    Now my fiancé's family is divided. Some think I'm being unreasonable and should make an exception for her kids, while others agree with our decision and think my SIL is overreacting. I'm starting to feel guilty and wonder if I'm in the wrong for sticking to our child-free rule.
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    AITAH for not allowing my sister- in-law to bring her kids to our wedding?
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    TL;DR: We're having a child-free wedding, my sister-in-law is upset and says she can't attend without her kids. I offered to help with a babysitter, but she refused. Now there's family drama, and I'm wondering if I'm being unreasonable.
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    The_Ghost_Reborn • 1d ago Why are you arguing with your inlaws? Your fiance should be handling his sister.
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    Dry_Sandwich_860 • 1d ago "I'm so sorry you won't be able to make it."
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    It's your wedding, so you and your fiance get to decide on the rules. The SIL can either attend or not. She should not be ruining your wedding by making a fuss and getting people to choose sides.
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    Most importantly, you should not be dealing with this. She is your fiance's relative, not yours. He should be dealing with her. Confrontations between in- laws never go well. If he is not willing to deal with her, then that is a read flag. There will be many other situations in life in which
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    you will need his support. It would be nice (but not necessary) to provide childcare. Maybe hire a nanny for the day to look after any kids whose parents can't find care.
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    OnlyOn Tuesdays289 1d ago Don't engage in the drama. Don't explain. Don't make excuses. Simply say, "I'm sorry you've decided not to attend. We will miss you"
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    jaggedjazz 1d ago Your fiancé's monkey, your fiancé's circus. You offered reasonable and generous solutions. He needs to take over dealing with his family now. NTA.
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    Alarming_Oil_6226 • 23h ago Nta. But your fiancé should. be dealing with his family. Not your pig, not your farm. Next time SIL gets on your case, hand the phone to your future dear husband and get yourself a treat for not exploding.
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    GrouchySteam • 1d ago At the end. It's an invitation, not a summoning. The event is to cater for the groom and bride. So if you rather keep it child free, then she doesn't met the requirements to be present, that simple. No need for tantrums. NTA.
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    Mukduk_30 • 22h ago I didn't go to my cousin's child-free wedding because it was a flight away and we really didn't have someone to take the kids for three days, plus spend thousands on airfare and hotel on site. I just said sorry we can't make it, congratulations, and sent
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    her a gift and that was that. No drama needed
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    Sensitive-Ad-5406 • 23h ago "We have chosen a child free wedding. That means no children. If some cannot attend, we respect that. If anyone tries to guilt or convince us to not have our wedding the way we want, they will be uninvited. ' NTA

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